It's been about two months now since the move to Calvin. (Yes, I know I'm terrible about updating this) Anyways, it's not exactly what I expected. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love it here. The academic challenge is amazing and is something that I definitely thrive on. But then I've always loved school. And the presence of God here on campus is more than I could have hoped for. To be able to experience God in each and every one of my classes, to be refreshed at chapel and sunday night service, it's amazing. And the church I've found is everything I could wish for. What else was I expecting then? I think that when I first got here I had my own ideas about how many friends I was going to have, and the kind of relationships I was going to have with those friends. You know you see everyone's pictures from college and there are these huge groups of people that all hang out together and do different things. That's not what I have here. Sure, I have friends, but they're a mish-mash from all different places. Some from the classics department, others are just down the hall, another from a dorm on the other side of campus. Yes, I have friends, but my friends don't generally hang out with my other friends.
The other side of that expectation, on the types of relationships I'd have with those people, is also different from what I thought would be going on. I thought once I got here I'd immediately have deep relationships with the people I'd meet, that we'd be able to stay and talk for hours about everything and nothing. That we would do everything together. Laugh and cry and play and relax and study. But that's not exactly what I have here either. Sure, I hang out with people, but it's at planned events and things of that nature. We're not really just crashing in someone's room with pizza and a movie. Sure, I go out with people, but while we're out the conversation stays on surface topics. Lighthearted and joking. That's all well and good, and don't get me wrong, I love it. I guess I'm still just disillusioned by the fact that I haven't found a "bosom friend" (As Anne of Green Gables would say) here at Calvin.
Yet in the midst of all of this, I feel like God has really been teaching me to lean on him more and more. That deep relationship I wanted? I've got all of that with God. In the past couple months I've begun to just allow God's peace to wash over me, comforting me when I worry, healing me when I feel rejected, and refreshing me in everything that I do.
So now I continue my life at Calvin College. I wake up every morning and I hope for good things. I trust in God to get me through the day. I lean on Him if things get difficult, and He rejoices with me as I find satisfaction and contentment. What else could I ask for?
