Augustine

Well, it appears that this state of boredom isn't going to leave me tonight. Thankfully I have plans for my Friday evening, so my non-existent audience will not be bothered by me until at the earliest.

Well, you (I don't know if there even is a you, but I can play pretend) remember how I mentioned in my last post about the different reasons people go to college, etc. etc? Well interestingly enough we had a discussion that seemed to illuminate for me why all of this works the way it does. We're currently reading St. Augustine's Confessions. (This will be my third time-ish going through it, thank you HFCC Honors Program) My professor was talking about what makes us who we are, and what motivates us to do what we do. There was a quote from Augustine that I really liked, "You have made us for yourself, and our hearts are restless until they rest in you". We seem to have this idea that we need to go and "find ourselves", that we have a certain identity, that there are things that we are and that we aren't. We arrange our priorities around the identity we construct for ourselves. But are we really who we think we are? How authentic is this identity we've constructed?

The thing is, everything we think we are, everything we make ourselves into, it's not us, it's not real, it's fake and it's empty if it's not centered on Christ. You can be going to college and working and volunteering at church and you can be completely off track if you're doing this because you think it's what you ought to be doing. And we'll never be completely happy and satisfied until we figure out who we are in GOD's eyes. Our true identity rests in him, and all that we can come up with for ourselves is at best only a shadowy reflection of what He has planned. I guess the idea that it comes down to is this: We are able to truly be ourselves when we are loving the right things in the right way. I think that's all I have to say for right now. Horrible way to end it, but there it is.

The purpose-driven college life.

Wow, two posts in one week! Actually I have to admit that it's due to the fact that I'm currently suffering from a cold/sore throat. (NOT the Swine Flu!) So here I sit, with no homework (That I'm willing to work on that is) and I still have a little while before I will permit myself to heat up some mac 'n cheese and curl up with a movie in this particularly cozy chair I've recently acquired.

I've been thinking lately about the different attitudes some people have towards school, college specifically. Some are in it because they have nothing else to do with their life, so college is just a way to put off becoming an "adult". Other people go to college I think because they're expected to by everyone. They also have no real goal to achieve while they're there but to pass their classes adequately. Then there are those people who go to college to have fun. New people, new experiences, exciting adventures. Other people just go to college because they have a career in mind, and they can't get into that field unless they have a college degree. And then there are the people who go to college because they truly enjoy learning. Really any of the above can be combined and those are pretty much all of the reasons people go to college. Most don't fall into that last category that I've discovered.

So why does this matter? And why am I wasting my time categorizing people? Well I think that by figuring out why one is in college, it says a lot about what they do while they're there. The people with no purpose or goal, they don't really care what they achieve while they're in college. Any grade will do as long as one isn't failing. Then those other people who are aiming specifically for a degree, well, of course they want to do well, but are they enjoying themselves while they're working so hard? They'd just as soon be done with college and be out in the workplace. And then there are the nerds like me. I absolutely love college. I love learning. I love succeeding. I demand a 4.0 from myself, not simply to keep a scholarship or for a nice transcript (though those are important reasons) but because I know what I am capable of, and I see failure as doing anything less than my potential. I've mentioned this to some people before, but if I had enough money I would just stay in school forever, and I would have a room wallpapered with degrees.

I guess my point is that I'm starting to understand more why people go about getting a college education in different ways. I used to always wonder why people weren't more upset over that grade that they got on the test. But I think I see why now. And I also know that college will always be a joy for me as long as I have decent professors and a mind that can produce A's.